"I'm nearly old enough to be your father." So?" Becca, I'm the only man you've got to know who loves you and has treated you properly. It's hardly surprising that you have strong feelings for me but you have no experience of other decent men to judge me against." So why can't I love you until I find someone better, if I ever do?" Don't you think that might be a bit unfair on me? It might be a bit unfair on you too in that you might feel you could not just cast me aside and decide you'd got to stick with me even though you had become bored stiff with me. That would be pretty miserable for both of us." Don't you find me attractive then?"Steven smiled sadly. "That's half the problem. I do find you very, very attractive but it would be totally wrong for us to have a physical relationship and not get married." What's to stop us getting married?" Our age difference and your lack of experience of men. In any case, sixteen is too young to take a step as big as that." I couldn't care less. Even in the classrooms I saw all kinds of things I wanted to try and use. Especially in Science class, we have glass tubes I kept thinking that some would fit, but they seemed to be so thin. But there are some nice fat ones also. A couple other things that caught my eyes, when we went to Chapel I saw the candles. For the first time I saw them as objects for pleasure. I saw some that I just knew would give pleasure if I could get my hands on them. I just knew they would just fit perfect.I know my mind was where it should not have been, I had that feeling on my mind, I wondered what it would feel like to have Judy or Mary licking me. Oh I bet the tongue would be softer that my finger. Walking out to the shed I could hear Mr. Johnson's dog was barking, we are all afraid to get to close to Mr. Johnson's stuff because of his big dog. It is a Collie and his name I think is Buster. Sister told me I was to work in the rear flower garden, to use the hand hoe, and take the weeds out. I know.
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